arrgh

I hate how I can feel it when people get sad. It always makes me feel somehow responsible for their sadness and like I should be able to do something to help them. And when I, albeit inadvertently, contribute to their sadness, or discomfort, or annoyance I feel so guilty. I really do not want to do anybody any harm. But that sometimes seems impossible. So, it's easy to gravitate to the other end of the spectrum and claim to not care about how others feel as a compensation for caring far too much. Shit, what do I care. It's late. I've had a goodnight taco. I've changed out of my sweaty, oldies night dancin' shirt, I've got some DVDs from the library to sort of sing me to sleep.
But I do care. it doesn't mean I can't put on a DVD tho. (btw, I've recently begun to enjoy shortening the word "though" to "tho". I don't know when exactly that happened or exactly why, but it has happened. I actually derive pleasure from the abbreviation.)